Metaphor: Dark matter described as a kind of cosmic glue holding galaxies together.
Problem: This metaphor imports everyday notions of stickiness, suggesting a substance actively binding objects. In reality, dark matter is inferred from gravitational effects; it is a relational alignment of mass-energy, not a material adhesive. The “glue” metaphor subtly misleads by giving agency and tangibility where none exists.
Relational ontology: Dark matter is a relational inference — its effects emerge from the alignment of potentials across spacetime. Galaxies are held together by relational dynamics, not glue.
Parody punchline: If dark matter were glue, the universe would come with a craft table, intergalactic paperclips, and physicists complaining about cosmic stickiness in their lab coats.
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